Spoon Full of Sugar
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Saved 7/23/09 to Spoon Full of Sugar

Not "that" Cool.

My daughter came across my old scrapbook and demanded to know "Who is this really cool chick!" Well it was me but do you think she'd believe me? Why is it so hard to believe that I could be cool---or was even VERY cool at one time in my life?

Somehow, "Wow--this is SO retro" just does not seem to be as big a compliment as I had hoped. I guess it is easy for me now to understand that whole "mid-life crisis" thingie. Perhaps that is what happens when we suddenly are faced with being "Just not ALL that" anymore, but I think I must have a choice.

Looking in the mirror I see the fine lines and at times they feel like giant crevasses that I have managed to crawl through during my life. Why must there be evidence all over me? I close my eyes and take an inventory and I am still that REALLY cool chick--I am just a slightly older -- OKAY perhaps a lot older. Why can't that just make me even more cool?

Last night I looked through that scrapbook and memories washed over me like they happened just yesterday. Dancing on Soul Train with Bo Derek Braids..who could have possibly been as cool as me? It is just impossible. Could I dance like that now? Hell yes-- but I wouldn't be able to walk the next day. Okay, I'll give you that one. Perhaps I am older. How about that time I scaled a cliff without safety gear just because I knew I could do it? Alright that was just foolish I know--but I did it. Doesn't that make me cool? Perhaps not.

What would make me cool in the eyes of a 15 year old? Seriously I don't think it is possible. I mean, I am one of the coolest people I know and if I can't be cool the who can? The coolness factor is now questionable and that is frightening. You should be frightened...I am. I am looking at the pages in that scrapbook like it will contain the miracle answer... and of course I know in my heart it will. OH man...I just read something I wrote in there...."If you must try to be cool--you aren't." What was I thinking back then? Could that be true?

Of course, if I was absolutely cool then---I still am. Why am I doubting myself or my coolness now? Of course I am cool. I am as cool as a 50 year old woman can be. Damn cool. Why is being cool so important? I guess if I had to choose between cool and beautiful...wouldn't cool be ageless? What about beauty? I guess it is reasonable to think that if a "coolness" factor can transcend time shouldn't beauty too? Okay let's just suppose for a moment that beauty changes, it is still there right? Of course it is so why wouldn't cool morph into even more coolness as I age?

I can't imagine how I suddenly became so uncool. I called my Mom and asked her. She's cool so she'd know right? She assured me that I am as cool as ever but my daughter had blighted coolness vision. My Mom said that she will be healed about the same time she becomes a Mom herself.

Damn. I hope I am "uncool" for a long time. I am not ready for THAT kind of cool.

cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
Ewwww...hairy humor.
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
:) That's funny *Cheeky*
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
What a "hair-raising" idea!
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
Yeah that would be funny to be wearing your own literal hair clip on :)
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
Oh yeah...with a sister-in-law and my BFF both being black I became educated in an entire universe of hair stuff that typically non-ethnically non-kinky haired people go their whole life in complete ignorance of. I was talked into a couple small hairpieces but fake red hair is usually pretty obvious so I paid the extra bucks to get human hair dyed to match mine. These are fun to play with. One is like a scrunchy with hair and looks really cute pulled around a bun. I also have a REALLY long ponytail that I got when I dressed up as "I dream of Jeannie" for halloween one year. I call them my "special occasion" hair thingies. I already have so much hair. I have sold and donated my hair before. Gosh...wouldn't it be weird if I bought my own hair back?
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
Have you been in a large hair store recently? I mean the kind that's just off the hook. I've seen some of them selling jewelry and name brand handbags. And I must say that some of that stuff looked really nice and the prices weren't outrageous either.
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
I was fortunate that my hair was ALL my hair. The problem with the Bo Derek look was the beads. The weight of them broke my hair off at the crown and then when they took out the braids handfuls of my hair fell out. I was forced to cut it short as when it grew back in I had a odd "Mohawk" down the middle part. I started parting my hair on the side then until my hair grew back.
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
I already have pretty long hair and thick. So I try to understand women that have the need for weaves. Yes it can look better with the outfit you're wearing to a certain event. But to wear that heavy stuff everyday...No way! And I have seen plenty of white women with hair extensions and ponytails. I was in a black hair store with a girlfriend one time and there were two white women in there trying on blonde ponytails. That store was huge and had a little something for everybody. And don't get me started on hair glue and that other stuff that's used to keep the hair pieces on. It messes up your real hair and scalp TOO much in my opinion. I think my girlfriend would have had better hair if she began to back off that thick black glue. She also had pieces sown in...ouch! If you are tender headed.
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
In the summer I used to do my daughters hair in corn rows. Most people look at Caucasians who have corn row hair and think "Why?" But realistically--once I had it done and saw how easy it was to take care of, it was a no-brain-er to do my daughter's hair. She was on the swim team, in and out of the water constantly but her hair was very long and didn't want to cut it. Corn rows during swim season made her life so much easier. (BTW--it is still washed and kept clean which many people are not aware of) My sister-in-law is black and she and their three girls constantly fight with their hair. It is something that those who are not subjected to ethnically kinky/nappy hair (her terms) just don't understand. It is why you never see them in the pool. Borrowing that "look" for the sake of convenience when going on dive trips has made my life simpler. So...I see the stares and simply shrug. My hair is not as long as it was way back then and I'd never wear beads in it again because that was miserably heavy. My daughter and I both have very thick hair. Most rubber-band type hair bands are not big enough for us to have a pony tail.
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
You know I can deal with women in braid but NOT corn rows. Those things look so tacky on women. Actually they look a little tacky on men too.
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
It took nearly two weeks for them to braid my hair. It was a headache that didn't go away until the braids were gone. Good grief--the things we do for fashion!
PinkNC PinkNC 4 years 45 weeks
"Dancing on Soul Train with Bo Derek Braids" :) That's cool.
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 45 weeks
Cool site! Thanks for sharing it!
Jinx Jinx 4 years 45 weeks
I think I'm cool for a :fogey: !!! LOL www.myparentswereawesome.com <--- I LOVE this site. Maybe your daughter has a contribution for them? :)
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 4 years 46 weeks
I went up a level in "coolness" recently. My daughter said I was her "hero" on her Facebook page. Made me tingle all over.
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 5 years 4 weeks
Just about the time I am reassured that I maintain my "coolness" factor, I go and do something so "mommy-ish" that it un-does the coolness. Why is being a mom so un-cool?
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 5 years 5 weeks
When my daughter was 10 we had a conversation about what "natural" beauty was and what "trendy" was. My yearbook was perfect to use as a demonstration. I asked her to pick people she thought were beautiful and those she thought were just plain freaky weird. Her choices were marvelous. Freaky weird=trendy. I showed her my mom's yearbook and she did the same with the same results. The bottom line was that natural beauty would be timeless, whereas trendy may someday be a point and laugh moment. She recently dyed her beautiful auburn hair blue===green and it took her only a week to decide this trend must simply GO. Unfortunately it will have to grow out unless we double-process. I am thinking the growing out process may be a better lesson. Somethings we can't undo as easy as growing out of it...like tattoos.
tdsollog tdsollog 5 years 5 weeks
Cheeky - I love this post! I can relate to it in many ways.... (I'm 38, BTW). I remember looking through photo albums as a kid, and looking at my folks, and thinking.... "Wow, what were THEY thinking?!?!?" and "Why did they dress me like that?!?!?!" ****Okay, it was was 70s ****** Now, my boys (age 11 and 13) are doing the same thing to my hubs and me. Ah, the circle of life!
ccpdm ccpdm 5 years 8 weeks
I am way damn cool for 52! OMG, cheeky, I just got around to having a few brain cells relaxed enough to read this post, and I LOVE IT!! It's like you opened up the back of my head, crawled around inside and emerged with.... THIS! I need not further expound. My youngest and only girl turned 20 this week. I got her a job as a counselor with my company at a different location, and her manager, whom I met for a glass of wine one evening, and she told me, "She says you're her best friend." I thought 'wow' at the time, and truly I must measure fairly high on the coolometer. I loooove this picture of you and feel like I know you! And keep on fighting, sister! They will drag us kicking and screaming into wrinkly saggy hell!!!! BTW, El, "Still, Grey Goose over ice with some peach schnapps and cranberry (touch of pineapple) next to the pool" ~ I concur!! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ "If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under." Ronald Reagan
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 5 years 8 weeks
Well...as you know that coolness factor includes friends....so WE ARE ALL COOL!
Stardustlove Stardustlove 5 years 8 weeks
You sound like a cool person! :)
samantha999 samantha999 5 years 8 weeks
:rotfl: *************** "I will marshal all the forces of darkness to hound you to an assisted suicide." - In the Loop
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 5 years 8 weeks
Well I am BAD...really REALLY Bad. Ya know it.
samantha999 samantha999 5 years 8 weeks
yeah i think your last name has to be jackson to pull off the mask thing. *************** "I will marshal all the forces of darkness to hound you to an assisted suicide." - In the Loop
cheekyredhead cheekyredhead 5 years 8 weeks
They wore masks...I am pretty damn cool but I am not sure I could pull a mask off...I mean...My hand is getting tired enough as it is...a mask would take more effort. I't tire of just one.