I am Tee...and I am a dog.
Hi Sugas - I'm Tee. I got excited when I saw the post on FB about the LOVEWRITEWIN contest! I have been wanting to get back into blogging again for a long time - I felt like that was my sign that today is the day! ;-) I am going to answer the questions posted but in my own way. I would like to introduce myself - I'm a military spouse, a mom of two, and a small business owner - and certified LOVE addict. lol In order to really know me, you have to know what drives my every move, every decision and every action - it's LOVE. It's both a blessing and a curse to be so love dependent. I try to explain to people what it means to be a love addict but sometimes its hard to articulate. So I usually use a the metaphor comparing people to cats vs. dogs. When I think about it - it really boils down to some people being cat people - and some people being dog people, like me.
My best friend has 3 in-house pets. 2 cats & 1 dog. I have always been intrigued by how different the personalities of the animals are. The cats are very anti-social – they don't want to be looked at, talked to, touched, smiled at or approached – they want to be left the hell alone. If or when they decide they want to be bothered with you – they will let you know it, they will get what they need from you – and then you can leave them alone again. You might get a "purr" of appreciation here and there – but for the most part, you better take what you can get and be happy with that. Period.
Bi-polar little bastids in my opinion ----------------->cats.
Oh but Maggie, my friend's dog – she is the total opposite. Maggie wants love ALL the time. She will meet you at the door to get love, she will get her love through a cage if she has to, she wants to be gazed upon, talked to, played with, rubbed, touched, smiled at and overstimulated! But its not just Maggie – every dog I have been around is like that.They are just 24 hour a day, 7 day a week living, breathing love banks…always taking deposits & allowing withdrawals – as much or as little as they can get or give.
It dawned on me one day how we humans can be separated into cat and dog categories. Yeah I know, it's been said before, but most times – it's said in relation to gender, men are dogs – women cats, etc. But that is not the case in reality. It has no relation to gender or sexual behavior…its not a man or woman issue - but a human issue. If we were going to categorize this thing by gender – then ironically it would be the other way around – men would be the CATS who ration out the love (not sex, but real love) and women would be the DOGS who just want to give and receive as much love as they can. But in reality, its not about gender at all…it's about people and what we prefer – what we like…what we want…and what we need.
Some people are more like cats. It takes an act of God to spark their interest, get them to warm up or show any sign of emotion. It takes a lot of work to get them excited about anything. The only way to get them excited is to do something that makes them uncomfortable or something that hurts them. Most times, that's the only way to get any real reaction out of a cat. My friend's cat just had surgery and he has been a lot more lovable since he went through that. He wants a lot more attention. It reminds me of some people who only look for love and compassion when they have been through something painful enough to appreciate getting it. Yep, some people are definitely cats. For them, love is not mandatory – it is optional. It can be readily accessible when they want it – but if its not, oh well, they just lick themselves and keep it movin!
And when it comes to getting any love from a cat, you will get it how and when they want to give it. The amazing thing is how valuable that love is when you get it – because its so rare! When Maggie runs up to me for love…I smile and play with her. But when one of the cats come over to me…I lose my mind! I get so excited…I just want to freeze that moment and figure out what made them come to me that time…and how I can get them to do it again?? Weird…how we tend to covet the love that is scarce…and sometimes neglect the love that's aplenty. Hmmm...
But then there are us dogs. I am a dog because I am a love fanatic. I will wait for the people I love at the door…I want them to see me, talk to me, touch me, hold me, play with me, laugh with me, acknowledge me! And I want to do the same for them in return. It doesn't take a lot to get a dog's attention…a slap on the leg, smack of the lips, a little whistle or food in a bowl…here they come….a rub on the back, a whisper in my ear, caress my face, look me in my eyes, cook me a candlelight dinner – and watch me run to you panting. Sometimes it seems like Maggie just needs you to touch her so she can know she is ALIVE. So she can know she isn't some inanimate, unworthy, unnecessary object just crapping and eating her way through life with no real purpose or productivity. For dogs, love is their pulse…it keeps them sane. Without it, they turn into savage nothings just roaming the streets trying to survive…and who wants to merely survive? Some of us humans are exactly like that…nothing lets us know we are alive and reminds us of our purpose the way that giving and receiving love does.
This makes me wonder about dogs who find themselves married to cats…or cats who end up with dogs. lol I firmly believe now that I married a cat…and slowly over the years, he worked hard to adjust as much as he could to my dog-like ways…and he is still working on it…however now, it is finally registering in my head that he will never ever be a full canine like me. And I am ok with that. My best friend admitted she is a cat (what is it with me and all the cat people heh?). And I can't argue with her – she is absolutely right! lol And I envy her for that reason. I can't believe I am going to say it because I detest the way cats act…but God knows I wish I could learn how to be more like them.
I imagine life to be a lot simpler for cats. I told my best friend that I find it quite pathetic being a dog…being dependent on love can be a draining and disappointing existence the majority of the time. Dogs don't rest. All the moments in between getting and giving love for them are like waiting rooms in their life. Real life begins and ends with love in a dog's world.
Yes, I would much rather learn to be a cat. Would switch over to the cat side right now if I could. But I have tried and it doesn't work. I am a love lightning rod. So I must accept my fate and learn to live with it. After all, there are some good things about being a dog. My friend assumed that the cats were ok for a long time…but it turned out, they needed care and she just didn't notice. Why? Because Maggie has been her focal point…cuz a dog makes herself known. The cats are so independent, so quiet and so apathetic toward love...that sometimes, it backfires on them when they need it most. Cats can sometimes be forgettable. And that is one thing a dog will never ever be ;-) We dogs will always get your attention...one way or another.
Can't change a dog to a cat person…can't change a cat to a dog person…you just have to recognize their worth, appreciate them for who they are and understand their needs if you are going to make a choice to love them and receive love back!
I'm Tee...and I'm a dog.