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Saved 4/13/09 to Tech Dating 101

Tech Dating 101: Is Texting During a Date Rude?



Hey, sometimes we all need a little help navigating the choppy waters of dating when tech gets tossed into the mix, and that's why DearSugar and I have teamed up for another installment of Tech Dating 101. Last week, we talked about canceling a date via text, and this week we're discussing whether or not texting and making calls during your date is an acceptable form of dinner fodder:

Can I text and make phone calls during a date without being rude?

To see what I think about using your tech during a date, just .

Part of me wants to say that if it's a mutual friend trying to contact you, it might be okay to reply, but deep down I know that making phone calls and texting during a bona-fide date is just rude. You are on a date because you want to get to know someone, not be tethered to your Twitter or incoming texts at the table.

But this is the real world, and we all know things come up. If you must text or make a call during a date, there is a way to do it discreetly — excuse yourself and head to the bathroom, cell in hand. This way, no one gets uncomfortable. Of course, emergencies are always the exception here. If you need to keep your cell within glancing distance, or are waiting for an important call, just tell your date what's up. I'm sure they'll appreciate knowing that you aren't just waiting for an excuse to leave. Unless of course you are just waiting for an excuse to leave, then I'd recommend checking out Getmooh before you meet up. You know, just in case.

To check out what Dear has to say about using your cell during a date, head on over to DearSugar.

Source

3 years 16 weeks
When I'm on a date, my phone is off and in my pocket. When I was in a relationship, my phone was off during dates. When I'm with a person I want to focus on them. If I was on a date and my date was texting I'd kindly pay my share and excuse myself...and not call them ever again.
4 years 7 weeks
i agree on this term.it is rude when she busy on text & checking on her phone in front of me while i am trying get to know her on first date in the restaurant..this happen to me a few days ago. i hope she realize that i don't like it that way.i don't feel a respect from her
4 years 25 weeks
I think it is rude and disrespectufl to your date. I went out a couple of times with this guy who kept looking at and playing with his cell phone all during dinner. During our second date his cell phone rang and he answered it, at the table. Proceeded to have a conversation with his friend about nothing important.
4 years 34 weeks
Yes its rude my boyfriend the other night. i had to take his phone just to be able to talk to him.
5 years 5 weeks
Whatever they say, I don't like it. That is being rude, so rude.
5 years 16 weeks
so rude! It's been done to me and I got angry and he put the phone away the rest of the night. john adults only
Matdredalia Matdredalia 5 years 22 weeks
I personally think that there are circumstances where using the phone is not only appropriate, but a must. If you have kids, or someone who depends on you like maybe a disabled or elderly family member, work, or something like that, then I think you should tell your date beforehand that you may have to take a call at some point, and if you do, you're really sorry in advance, but it's something you can not just ignore. The key thing here, I believe, is to let the date know ahead of time that you have obligations beyond your control, so that they know you're not just blowing them off. Just my two cents :)
aistea311 aistea311 5 years 22 weeks
My best friend is totally against any usage of cell phones during dinner, she is very strict about it and I am starting to listen more. My sister is the worst!
5 years 22 weeks
Yes text while on a date is RUDE !!!
Jessiebanana Jessiebanana 5 years 22 weeks
dm8bri, please speak for yourself. I've received emergency texts. Because I tend to keep my cell on silent or vibrate for school or work people will send me text messages to ensure I get the message and the text will usually say "Call me back, it's important."
Jessiebanana Jessiebanana 5 years 22 weeks
If your constantly texting it bothers me. But one or two an hour is ok, especially if the text is light and social and you can share what your sending.
dm8bri dm8bri 5 years 22 weeks
Rude rude rude. A text is never important enough to respond to - if it were an emergency the person would call, I'm sure. In the case of a phonecall, if you HAVE to take it (emergency only, please), excuse yourself from the table and apologize profusely when you come back.
Calekey Calekey 5 years 22 weeks
If I were to know something could be occuring *like major major occurance, possible illness worsening or someone was going to give birth if it was sister* would be the only time right to actually take the call. Other people can wait. And agreeing with many others it's just rude but also you should let the date know WHAT is up.
Lavinie Lavinie 5 years 22 weeks
it's rude.... no other excuse.. .i hate it when i'm even out with friends and they're constantly texting back and forth while out at dinner..
Carrie-Sue Carrie-Sue 5 years 22 weeks
Definitely rude, and shows a distasteful lack of interest. I wouldn't do that to a guy, nor would I stick around for a guy who did that to me.
witchbaby witchbaby 5 years 22 weeks
so rude! It's been done to me and I got angry and he put the phone away the rest of the night.
krkeegan krkeegan 5 years 22 weeks
I agree with #2, it is rude no matter what. Dinner or any form of a date is time you should be spending socializing with that person. If you truly need to use the phone excusing yourself is probably the best thing.
starangel82 starangel82 5 years 22 weeks
It is rude. I think it is rude to text at the dinner table at all, date or no date. Like you said geek, if you must, then excuse yourself to the ladies' room.
Angelica Angelica 5 years 22 weeks
I agree with you, geek! I think it's rude if you are in the first few months of dating, but fine later if you explain why you need to take the call and keep it under a minute. Sounds, like a lot of rules, but there's nothing more annoying than someone talking on the phone during date time. Especially if it feels like friends are calling to check up on how it's going. So unclassy.