Where does this go?
I have been friends with a guy for almost fifteen years--grew up together literally down the street, same circle of friends. Five years ago during college we started "talking"-he claims dating but it was never actually declared officially or to me or to his friends who berated him for playing games and screwing up something good. He then effectively blocked every attempt by anyone else (his friends and mine) from trying to date me by staking his claim to me. Never overt but he effectively scared off everyone else. When pushed for an official title, he resisted and instead began officially dating an ex-girlfriend in a mostly on, sometimes off relationship. Despite getting back together, we kept in touch and remained friends and occasionally more in the off again periods. The sentiment expressed both during and after their breakup was the existence of feelings for me despite their relationship, however he's yet to make any kind of move in the year since they split.
In an effort to move on with my life since inwardly I know nothing will ever go anywhere even if i don't really want to accept I've wasted my time on something that could be there I have tried to cut him out of my life and he objects...loudly and profusely. After that something goes inevitably wrong in one of our lives (stalkers (long story) family cancer scares, death of close friends and family etc.) and we inevitably revert back to fifteen years of friendship, love, support, hand holding and hospital visits.
Psychologically, the back and forth is a bad situation and it is starting to irritate everyone we know on both ends. However, the mutual feelings are insanely obvious to those around us and new significant others are often compared and found lacking by friends and family alike. We both admit feelings on both sides but acting on it...well it hasn't gotten there yet and may not ever. I know I need to do something but I can't figure out what but it is a vicious cycle. Cutting him out isn't an option because of the circle we've built and something going wrong but I can't find a healthy way to deal with this. Please help.