New Yorker
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Saved 7/16/07 to New Yorker

You know you're from NYC when...


Sad but true... I agree with many of these (some of my favs are bolded):

1.You say "the city" and expect everyone to know that this means Manhattan.

2.You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.

3.You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park at 3:30 on the Friday before a long weekend, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.

4.Hookers and the homeless are invisible.

5.The subway makes sense.

6.You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.

7.You've considered stabbing someone just for saying "The Big Apple".

8.The most frequently used part of your car is the horn.

9.You call an 8' x 10' plot of patchy grass a yard.

10.You consider Westchester "upstate".

11.You think Central Park is "nature."

12.You see nothing odd about the speed of an auctioneer's speaking.

13.You're paying $1,200 for a studio the size of a walk-in closet and you think it's a "steal."

14.You've been to New Jersey twice and got hopelessly lost both times.

15.You pay more each month to park your car than most people in the U.S. pay in rent.

16.You haven't seen more than twelve stars in the night sky since you went away to camp as a kid.

17.You go to dinner at 9 and head out to the clubs when most Americans are heading to bed.

18.Your closet is filled with black clothes.

19.You haven't heard the sound of true absolute silence since the 80s, and when you did, it terrified you.

20.You pay $5 without blinking for a beer that cost the bar 28 cents.

21.You take fashion seriously.

22.Being truly alone makes you nervous.

23.You have 27 different menus next to your telephone.

24.Going to Brooklyn is considered a "road trip."

25.America west of the Hudson is still theoretical to you.

26.You've gotten jaywalking down to an art form.

27.You take a taxi to get to your health club to exercise.

28.Your idea of personal space is no one actually standing on your toes.

29.$50 worth of groceries fit in one paper bag.

30.You have a minimum of five "worst cab ride ever" stories.

31.You don't notice sirens anymore.

32.You live in a building with a larger population than most American towns.

33.Your doorman is Russian, your grocer is Korean your deli man is Israeli, your building super is Italian, your laundry guy is Chinese, your favorite bartender is Irish, your favorite diner owner is Greek, the watchseller on your corner is Senegalese, your last cabbie was Pakistani, your newsstand guy is Indian and your favorite falafel guy is Egyptian.

34.You're suspicious of strangers who are actually nice to you.

35.You secretly envy cabbies for their driving skills.

36.You think $7.00 to cross a bridge is a fair price.

37.Your door has more than three locks.

38.Your favorite movie has DeNiro in it.

39.You consider eye contact an act of overt aggression.

40.You run when you see a flashing "Do Not Walk" sign at the intersection.

41.You're 35 years old and don't have a driver's license.

42.You ride in a subway car with no air conditioning just because there are seats available.

43.You're willing to take in strange people as roommates simply to help pay the rent.

44.There is no North and South...

45.It's uptown or downtown.

46.When you're away from home, you miss "real" pizza and "real" bagels.

47.You know the differences between all the different Ray's Pizzas.

48.You're not in the least bit interested in going to Times Square on New Year's Eve.

49.Your internal clock is permanently set to know when Alternate Side of the Street parking regulations are in effect.

50.You know what a bodega is.

51.You know how to fold the paper in half, vertically, so that you can read it on the subway or bus without knocking off other passenger's hats.

52.Someone bumps into you, and you check for your wallet.....

53.You cringe at hearing people pronounce Houston St. like the city in Texas.

54.Film crews on your block annoy you, not excite you.

55. People from other states can't tell a polar bear from a peanut, but they know you're from NY the second you open your mouth.

56. When you are able to make a right turn at a red light.. you think it's the best thing ever.

57. Rather than waiting safely on the sidewalk to cross the street, you wait inches away from speeding traffic waiting to cut through it.

58. Your local news is national news.

59. You walk a mile in 13 minutes and think that everything should be open 24/7.

60. You know who Dr. Z is...

61. You think you know better than everyone else in the world.. when in reality.. well.. you do.

62. Yellow light means speed up.

63. Red light means speed up because you know have that 1 second pause until the other light turns green.

64. Communicating with people on the road only takes one finger.

65. You order your dinner and have it delivered.. from the place across the street.

66. You cross the street on a greenlight, and if you get hit by a car you blame the driver for "not watching where they're going."

67. You can tell a gunshot from a firecracker and not get scared, but when you go to the burbs you get scared of hearing a cricket.

68. You know the lights above the skyscrapers is the closest thing we have to stars.

Saved to

New Yorker

my new year's eve Bodum in NYC is moving! DO YOU READ THE NEWSPAPER?
Khameleon Khameleon 6 years 39 weeks
Yeah, someone was talking to me about their porch the other day and I took it to mean a backyard deck or something and not the front of the house...if only they had said stoop!
marguerite87 marguerite87 6 years 49 weeks
so true! This was so funny!
KiwiLu KiwiLu 7 years 1 week
LMAO very very true my favorites are 40,57, and 59
Ultress Ultress 7 years 1 week
live on the LES...anyone want to put money on the most annoying film crews being HERE? And as an aside----DOWN WITH THE MTA!!!!!!
onceajrzgrl onceajrzgrl 7 years 2 weeks
I definitely agree with these and are great!!! Although it has been quite some time since I have moved out of NY and now living in Suburbia in Virginia, I get back to the swing of things with no problem when I come back!!!!
millarci millarci 7 years 8 weeks
I'm from Jersey but I want to live in NYC one day. Even after reading this, I still want to live there. :)
BlackPowerBunny BlackPowerBunny 7 years 9 weeks
i'm not originally from new york city, but i agree with just about all of these! and as a texan i did know that Houston isn't pronounced like my hometown! be the change you wish to see in the world.
vmruby vmruby 7 years 9 weeks
I am a native New Yorker and these are so true!!!!! :ROTFL:
lintacious lintacious 7 years 10 weeks
okay... i hate these lists. they are rude and false and contradictory and not funny.
TidalWave23 TidalWave23 7 years 10 weeks
Love it...I'm from Bergen County, NJ (North Jersey, 15 mins outside the city) and a few of these are also on the "You know you're from Jersey when..." list. Too funny :)
sexyeyes sexyeyes 7 years 10 weeks
:rotfl: Anai _____________________________________________________________ Behind every great man, there's a woman rolling her eyes :oy:
anaisethenry anaisethenry 7 years 10 weeks
I'm not a native New Yorker, but I catch on quickly... :rotfl: _________________________________________________________ "Despite the fact that there are over eight million people on the island of Manhattan, there are times you still feel shipwrecked and alone." ~Carrie
kristine13 kristine13 7 years 10 weeks
this list is hilarious! and so true
JustPlainJane JustPlainJane 7 years 10 weeks
These are great, I love them *Thank you. My real name... is plain... Jane Jones. (Alice - Closer)
sexyeyes sexyeyes 7 years 10 weeks
I'm a New Yorker for sure even thought I live in New Jersey which is almost the same b/c I know NYC very well as much as I know New Jersey! _____________________________________________________________ Behind every great man, there's a woman rolling her eyes :oy: